Bush sees the Elephant

Finally, after missing out during the Vietnam War and playacting on the U.S.S. Abraham Lincoln...

THE WHITE HOUSE
UNITARY EXECUTIVE
GEORGE W. BUSH

For Immediate Release
Office of the Unitary Press Secretary
December 15, 2008

Unitary Executive Order 5: Awards-Combat Infantry Badge, Combat Action Ribbon, Purple Heart

BUSH, GEORGE W.

Citation: For exceptionally meritorious service and professional achievement in the superior performance of duties above and beyond the call of duty while serving as the Unitary Executive of America, George Dubya Bush did successfully dodge murderous enemy combatant fire while undergoing torturous questioning in Baghdad, Iraq on 14 December 2008. Although the Unitary Executive’s quick reflexes saved him from injury by the deadly shoe barage; he bravely withstood the cutting remark which characterized him as a “dog.” Unitary Executive Bush’s gallantry at the press conference and his extraordinary grammatical errors at the risk of...blah, blah, blah,...his life,..blah,...highest traditions,..blah, blah,...Texas Air National Guard,...blah,... great credit,...blah, blah, blah,...et cetera,..blah,... his country.

GEORGE W. BUSH

THE WHITE HOUSE

December 14, 2008

SIGNING STATEMENT: Oh, I forgot. And a Presidential Medal of Freedom.